I loved it.
Beautiful. Clean. Loved it.
A nice surprise (at least in my opinion) was the court house. This is a magnificent building on an entire block. The photo shows the entrance that leads to the tower which is open to the public (for free) Monday through Saturday from 9 AM to 4:45 PM. Loved it.
I also had moments of realizing that if I may maintain a weight loss of ten pounds a month, by the time I go to Minnesota for my son's wedding, I will be at the weight my children remember me as being as they were growing up. That totally seems doable.
So there is a lot to feel good about. So why does it seem like I am having to try so hard to feel good?
Yesterday, my favorite TV (had picture in picture) conked out. Even that bummed me out a little. What seemed like pluses however, is that this TV was a huge older Sony. So big that it takes two people to move it...two people stronger than me. It can't do digital, HD or hdmi. And since it was so heavy and in my bedroom...there it has existed without being moved for years.
Here's the kicker. As I mentioned, I loved this TV. I loved the picture in picture. I loved how big the screen was. Yet barely a week prior, we had been in Costco and I was marvelling at how much I would love to buy one of the new 48" or bigger flat screen TVs for the living room. Just couldn't justify it though because we already have too many tvs. Voila! Room has been made now for a new TV.
And the bonus is that I was finally able to justify having the TV moved and moving the furniture it sat upon. And let me just say there was dust. Dust a plenty that was removed. And now our bedroom has been cleaned and infused with new energy. So that is good.
What seems like I have hit is one of those stops along the way where you know where you wish to be (manifesting my divine self in the physical), but not being there yet...frustration. Especially, since I don't feel like I know what to do next.
I need to keep my eye on the prize. I guess if nothing else, how good am I able to feel about my destination? How good will it feel when I finally have reached my destination? Will it be more awesome than I even imagined?
And as I write this, perhaps my trip to Santa Barbara is the perfect metaphor. Eleven of us were to go. We planned this trip over a month in advance to ensure all would be able to attend. The week before, we did some Mapquesting to ensure we would get there without being lost. Although, technically we already knew we could simply follow the Pacific Coast Highway signs and reach our destination. The day of the trip, everyone cancelled. So thank you times a million to my man, Manny, who went with me anyway. Once we were there, there were plenty of maps and information booths, etc. to ensure we would have an excellent time. And yes, it was even more beautiful, clean and wonderful than I expected in my mind.
Two other things helping me keep going: this blog and my "keep dreaming until your dreams come true" sign I made and placed in my home.
Tomorrow is the equinox and a full moon. I am sharing the video below, because while part of me has this particular vision of what I feel would be a lovely co-creation, another part feels merging with my Higher Self and being this in physical manifestation is more what I really came here to do. And the video helps me remind myself of this. And I am very appreciative because currently I feel like I am in great need of this support. So thank you, thank you, thank you to all for the support to help keep me on track.
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